My Promise to you xx

I promise to live and find hope again. It seems dark and cold without you, but I know hope for future is there…somewhere

I promise to live again. To breathe again. To find joy again. Bit by bit, day by day…and not feel guilty for it.

I promise to not wreck all your tools, sorry If I’ve stuffed your drill, I know you hate that!

I promise to look after your cattle. And that dumb dog that misses you nearly as much as I do!

I promise to not get ripped off, to keep my eyes open and think about my budget.

I promise to never ever ever forget you, I promise to love for evermore. You are always going to be a very special part of me, I like that.

I promise to pursue the freedom we found in Christ.

I promise to never give myself to anyone else who doesn’t love me properly, like you did, like you taught me to expect. Man, I love how you loved me.  And I guess love me still.

I promise to forgive God for taking you away from me. That He loves me, and it’s not punishment or that I deserve crap.

I promise to never let the kids forget you, not that I think they will. I cannot be Dad to them, but I will try to be a good mum.

I promise to get it together and try to get a job so we can move onward.

I promise to not isolate myself, to let people in, to stay vulnerable.

I will try and see the world and do things, I know you would want that.